Jack and Jill and Richard and Shawn

Tonight, my wife and I went to see Adam Sandler's silly comedy, Jack and Jill. It featured, predictably,over-the-top physical comedy,fart sounds and wisecracking children. I had a personal interest in this story about twins,as I am a twin. Shawn,who is five minutes younger than I,is a great delight to me. As we are boy and girl twins,we are not as close as same-sex twins might be. We neither shared a room while growing up nor shared each other's clothes. However,Shawn and I share a closeness that I do not have with my other sisters. In Sandler's film,the twins spoke a language all their own and had a bond which could not be denied- as much as Sandler's character tried to. Shawn and I will turn 60 years old in a few days and have arranged to be together on our birthday. She will fly to Anchorage from Atlanta,where she lives,and will join me for a week of ministry that I have in beautiful Alaska. My wombmate and I have a bond and will rejoice that we have lived this long,that our mother is still living and that we still like to hug each other...just as we did when we were children.
Tonight, Adam Sandler made me laugh and Shawn Farmer Monroe makes me smile.

Our mother didn't write the following, but she could have:

Two faces to wash,and four dirty hands
Two insistent voices,making demands
Twice as much crying,when things go wrong
The four eyes closing,with slumber song
Twice as many garments,blowing on the line
Two cherubs in the wagon,soaking up sunshine
Work I do for twins,naturally comes double
But four arms to hug me, repay all my trouble
- Author Unknown

In Time

Today I went to the movies and saw In Time. This fantasy film poses this question: Suppose time was our currency? In the film, people paid for goods and services by having minutes and hours deducted from an account that was kept on their arms. One would look at one's arm and say or think, "I have only a decade left". The film gave me a renewed appreciation for the time we have and gave me a renewed commitment to waste not one minute. If I were a sluggard, which I am not, this film would have been the kick in the rear necessary to get me moving.
The psalmist said that his times were in God's hands(Psalm 31:15)So are ours. If a room in a hotel were to cost me a month of my life or a bag of groceries were to cost me 10 hours, I would think seriously about every act and every purchase.While I am not counting down on some visible clock and have no idea of when my time is up, I must be a careful steward of the minutes, hours, days, months and years that I have left. Eugene Peterson, in The Message paraphrase of the bible, renders Ephesians 5:16 this way:"Make the most of every chance you get. These are desperate times!"
Not a bad idea. Let us live...In Time.

Chat with Mudder

With homage to the Bowery Boys, I call my mother "Mudder". She is one of the great lights of my life. She will celebrate her 81st birthday on October 16 and shows no signs of slowing down. Mudder is a model for those of us who watch her. She is a life-long learner, is physically active, spiritually alive and is a loving mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, aunt, cousin and friend.In our last weekly chat, Mudder told me that she'd struck gold. She was sorting through papers which belonged to her mother (1900-1998) and came across notes which my grandmother took in a class in 1924. My mother knew that I, amateur family historian, would want to see that 87 year old sample of my grandmother's writing. I have no plans to ever stop Mudder when she is telling a story. When she speaks, she is handing off history to us. We would be foolish to stop the flow of historical data.
I am sooooooo glad Mudder is still with us. If you have an elder speaking to you and finding scraps of paper as they clean house, embrace both the elder...and the scraps of paper.

A Four Hour Drive to Glennallen

Early this morning, shortly after midnight, I landed in Anchorage on US Airways flight 140.
Harley Bowerman met me at the airport and we began the four drive to the Alaska Bible College. I have never had a bad trip to this state, having been here at least a dozen times. However, traveling from 12:30 a.m. to 4:30 a.m. does not put one in the best shape for an 11:00 a.m. chapel service. My eyes were open for entire drive and, after some sleep,for the entire chapel.
Sometimes we push ourselves in the name of ministry and it is not inappropriate. I would not wish to make such a journey on a regular basis, but today was memorable. We came upon no midnight moose, no wandering caribou and no car problems.What more could one ask?
All is well.

I don't like the fitness center

That's not an entirely true statement. I dislike, very much, the getting up and getting there. Once there, I am energized by the workout that I give my body. On Mondays, Wednesday and Fridays, I swim non-stop laps for 45 minutes. On Tuesdays and Thursdays I am on the elliptical machine for 30 minutes, followed by a circuit on some core-strengthening machines. I take the weekends off. We only get one body while on this terrestrial ball, so we must take care of it. We have to turn it in at the end of life. We can have rods inserted, fat sucked out, parts replaced and pieces removed. However, we still get only one body on this side of Jordan. Since that is true, let us be good caretakers. I am no fitness guru. The single motivation for me to stay fit is that I picture (and see) what limitations are placed on one, when one is out of shape. There are trips you can't take and hills you can't climb. There are grandbabies you can't run with and days at the park you can't enjoy. I am not going out like that!! So, tomorrow I will drag my body to the center again. I will be in a great mood when I leave there.

All Eyes on Irene

This weekend, August 26-27, 2011 we are hearing about Hurricane Irene. Her high winds are going to be of such force as to overwhelm people in coastal towns along the eastern seaboard. Storms frighten us, and rightly so. We cannot stare down 100 mph winds. The storm is an apt metaphor for life. Sometimes the winds blow and almost destroy us.
In the gospel of Jesus as Mark recorded it, there is the story of a storm calmed by Jesus. He merely spoke to the storm and told the winds and the waves to behave themselves. The disciples asked, "Don't you care if we drown?" (Mark 4:38, NIV). Of course, he cares! Our God does not aways spare us from going through the storm. Neither does he guarantee that there won't be injuries or fatalities. We do know that Christ is present with us in the storm.
In 1905, Charles Albert Tindley (1851-1933) wrote the hymn, Stand By Me. The first stanza reminds me of Hurricane Irene.
"When the storms of life are raging, stand by me;
When the storms of life are raging, stand by me;
When the world is tossing me like a ship upon the sea;
Thou who rulest wind and water, stand by me.

Irene may seem to rule the east coast today, but God rules Irene!!

Aibileen and Skeeter

Last night Rosemary and I went to see The Help. The film, based on Kathryn Stockett's novel, is set in Jackson, Mississippi. Skeeter is a recent grad of Ole Miss (The University of Mississippi) and returns home to pursue her dream of being a writer. Aibileen is a maid and suffers the indignities that nearly all domestics suffered in the 1960s. Although these women often provided the love and stability that some homes lacked, many were underpaid, poorly treated and disrespected. Skeeter gets Aibileen to open up and talk about her relationship with her employers. Other maids join her and Skeeter documents their stories in a tell-all book.
With a mix of humor and social commentary, The Help reminds us that we are not that far away from a horrible time in our national history. It has been not quite 50 years since we enacted legislation that made civil behavior toward others, law. My paternal grandmother worked for many years as a maid at the Lombardy Hotel in New York City. Nana Farmer was The Help. She had no Skeeter.

On Sharing Dessert

Yesterday after a worship celebration at St. Paul Baptist Church in Dallas(where I was the guest preacher), three friends and I went to a restaurant for lunch. The meal was delicious, the presentation elegant and the calories abundant. When we were asked if we'd like dessert, three of us said, "no". Our fourth partner ordered cake with ice cream, which arrived with four plates and spoons. All who said "no" to dessert dipped their spoons in the dessert and did eat and were satisfied. It was not the first time I did what I said I would not. Nor was it the first time I have shared good food and good times with friends.
Sharing. Not a bad idea...most of the the time.

Out of Sequence

Last night a bunch of us went to the Cheesecake Factory. I told Timothy I was going to have my cheesecake first. He thought I was kidding. I am tired of coming to the end of a meal and having no room for dessert. So, both the Farmer men had their cheesecake first. We violated no law, broke no command, were guilty of no questionable moral or ethical acts and hurt no one. The extent of our "crime"? We ate out of sequence. I am determined to do that in other areas of life. Try a new route home, read a book of a different genre, try a different food. Not all sequences, traditions and customs must be honored. Go ahead,have a slice of pie today...before your meal.

A Mama Walks

My 86-year-old mother-in-law, Marvella Simmons, walked yesterday. She has been in the hospital for more than a month and has spent most of the time in the bed. Yesterday, a bright-faced young physical therapist coddled, coaxed and coached Mom until she agreed to take a few steps with a walker. We applauded like we do when babies take their first steps unaided. Oh, Mobility, how we take thee for granted. I walk without any human aid and with little thought. Yesterday, I celebrated Mom's steps and my own privilege of putting one foot in front of the other. We walk by faith and not by sight. We walk with walkers and unaided. We walk indoors on treadmills and outdoors in parks. My response to the fact hat we walk at all?  Hallelujah!!!

Family Matters

Today Timothy and I are in San Diego. My wife will join us this evening. Rosemary and I were joined in marriage in this beautiful city in 1981. I have here, a mother-in-law, sister-in-law and a host of cousins-in-law. As soon as Timothy and I landed yesterday we starting visiting family. What a joy to have one and be part of one. The psalmist says that "God sets the lonely in families" (68:6a, NIV). Another rendition of that verse says that God "sets the desolate in a homeland." Both versions celebrate the truth that God has given us each other. The divine design has us as part of something larger than ourselves.We are better off because we have family. Every family group has some, shall we say, "colorful characters". Some families have members that humiliate the family and spoil every gathering. However, those knuckleheads are still ours. Family matters- to us and to God.

The Bittersweet Visit of a Beloved Son

Our only child, Timothy, is home this weekend. Having just finished a summer course at Texas A&M University, where he will be a freshman this Fall, Timothy came home for a break. When I see our 18-year-old, I am both elated and saddened. I MISS him sorely. As an only child, he had much of our attention when he was here. Now driving, socially well-adjusted and quite gregarious, he simply doesn't need us as much. I miss hearing my name called with that regular rhythm that marks parenting in years 1-18. However, watching Timothy navigate the world, handle his checking account, relate to his friends and do his laundry brings me great delight. Tomorrow we will travel to San Diego and visit Timothy's maternal grandmother. She will, though hospitalized and slowly recovering from surgery, delight in Timothy more than I. 
I was, at one time, not even sure that was possible. :)

Connecting the dots:London looters

As I write today, there is rioting and looting going on in London and neighborhoods near London. Those involved in this random destruction are citing injustice and economic disparity as justification for their actions. Yes, there has been an incident in which police shot a young man of color. Yes, there are wide gaps between the haves and the have nots or the have lesses. This writer wonders how burning a small independent dress shop or smashing the plate glass entry to a store solves the problem of police brutality. How does looting address economic woes? One commentator said the actions of these young rioters has more to do with lack of discipline and poor parenting than with anything else. I must take full responsibility for ALL my actions and blame nothing on the economy, "the system" "the man" or insufficient breast feeding and bonding with my mother. After the dust clears and the rubble is cleaned up, the looters will have to travel farther just to go to a grocery store. This, of course, is after they are released from jail.

Thank God it's Monday

TGIM. I am grateful for Mondays. Fresh start. New opportunities to "get it right". The possibility of a do over of the days I messed up last week.
I like to start the week reviewing what went on on Sunday and then plotting a course for the rest of the current week. My week, and probably yours as well, seems to peak on Wednesday. Many of us attend a midweek gathering in churches or service organizations and it reminds us that half the week is already gone. If we were slackers on Monday and Tuesday, Wednesday is a wake up call. If we have been productive, Wednesday is a reminder to finish the week strongly. Either way, Monday is a great day on which to decide, "I'm going to have a significant week". The alternative stinks. Who would decide to have a lackluster week? Not I.
Not you?
Thank God...it's Monday!!!

Saturday night anticipation

Since my early teen years, I have been filled with anticipation on a Saturday night. I LOVE the mystical something that happens to us all, when we gather with other lovers of the Christ. We think of our great God during the week. We sing as we go about. We read scripture daily. However, on Sunday it takes on a different feel. The thinking about God is done in a congregational context. The singing is with choir, "praise team" and congregation. The reading of scripture is public and to the gathered saints...and ain'ts.

On a typical Saturday night, I am like a child waiting for Christmas morn. Oh the gift that Sunday morning is!! I became a lover of Jesus at age 12 and more than 40 years later, the thrill of being with my brothers and sisters, my fathers and mothers, my surrogate sons and daughters, is still there.

It's Saturday night and I am counting the hours until the first morning service tomorrow.
I hope to have no normal Saturday nights for the rest of my life.

iphones and swimming pools

A few principles that guided my last 24 hours:


1. Swimming non-stop breaststrokes for 40 minutes in a lap pool is good.
2. Having your iphone in the pocket of your swim trunks when you enter the water is bad.
3. Taking your iphone out of your swim trunks after two laps is too late.
4. Visiting an AT&T store to replace a drenched, non-operating iphone is time-consuming.
5. Laughter, especially at oneself, is good.

On The First of August

In a move to honor their emperor Augustus, the Romans changed the name of the month Sextilis ("sixth" in Latin) to Augustus. Thus, we have August. It is the month we think of as the "last month of summer". We gear ourselves for the beginning of the academic year which, for many of us, begins in September. June and July seem to have flown by. Here we are, planning one last flight, a few more outdoor grilling parties and one more trip to the beach.

My personal commitment is to live each day as if it is my last. Today, I want to laugh, love, eat, listen to music, read, pray and celebrate. If I am to wake up in Papa's House tomorrow, I shall have no regrets.

Have a great August!!!!

Tickling a Thai Baby

Today is Sunday, July 31, 2011. This morning I preached at the Dallas Chinese Bible Church, in Richardson,TX. I had such a good time with my brothers and sisters there. I had the privilege of presenting both the children's sermon and "the other one". The children were full of energy and made me smile. At the conclusion of the service, a couple brought to me their Timothy, whom they'd adopted from Thailand. I had shared some stories of our own son Timothy and it was time to meet another. I nuzzled him and tickled his little belly and was flooded with memories of hugging and kissing my now 18-year-old Timothy.

Each time I am with children, I am reminded that we have a future. Those precious bundles of energy are not the church of tomorrow. They are a vital part of what we are today!

If you are with a child today, kiss him/her. A tickle wouldn't be a bad idea either.

Thoughts on the close of July

Yesterday, July 29, was my wife's birthday. "What do you want for your birthday?", I usually ask. I don't want to buy something Rosemary doesn't want. She wanted a DVD of Secretariat (a wonderful Disney film), cash and Kathryn Stockett's book, The Help.
She also wanted our only child, Timothy, to come home from Texas A&M University. I flew down to get Timothy, brought him home and we had a great family dinner, as we celebrated Rosemary's life. We were joined by my sister, nephew and a few good friends.
When all the dust and smoke of a busy life clears, we are left with the memories we create and the dinners we can't forget. I am trying to live much more slowly these days, so as not to miss the high points. They are rarely experienced in the fast lane.